Over you

There's a chasm between acceptance and forgetting. I've accepted her almost complete absence, but every day think of her. When life is busy, or when it slows to a snail's pace, snippets of her come. I'm thankful they do not stay as they did months ago but I'm looking forward, mostly, to few if any. It's not to say the thoughts, the memories are bad, quite the opposite, and that's the problem. The challenge in life is not in finding that person, but in learning to live without them.

A tired sign

Along the path teeters a weary sign. Battered and rusted, bent and discolored, it's one of many along this road. Lessons learned, she now grows ever smaller in the rear view, inexorably

pinching to a vanishing point, fading in the light blue haze that only time and distance brings.

Awakened

Like a slight breeze blowing fog over the bay, thoughts of you come in...

They awaken me from a deep sleep and try as I might, they do not leave, but linger

There is no comfort in these thoughts, just a sadness that weighs on me, a heavy quilt of patchwork memories.

In the end, the writing helps more than anything... It's not conversation, but the words need saying, the mind needs to share so that once again I'm able to rest.... But daily you're there, like an incredible sweetness on the very end of my tongue... And in the silent midnight pitch, tears well-up and fall.

Dating myself

I think it was my daughter, Amanda who told me about this: Dating Myself.

I'm going to give this a whirl. Dinners are half price, movie tickets as well, I get my own humor - and will even sometimes laugh at myself (though usually when recovering from something dumb), and in the morning will wake-up to a person I want to make breakfast for...  Actually, this is going to be a lot of fun :-)

Our tree

A seed was planted years ago. Watered in life storms and baked in the heat of pain, she was nurtured and grew.

Diminutive once, now a tree; tall and strong, and swaying in strife's winds, bowing in response, un-breaking - her roots deep, wide, holding onto the soil that surrounds and feeds.

The cold months now lie upon her and though appearing asleep, growth is happening in whispered tones. Do not fret, for Spring is just around the corner and again you will see blue skies and feel the warmth of the sun upon your translucent fluttering leaves.